The Debate

It was pretty boring. No one melted down though Thompson came just short with his “let’s fire the Homos” comment. No one really set the stage on fire either. Here is my short take on each of the candidates.

Giuliani: Reagan! 9/11! Optimism! Reagan! Terror! As for Roe vs. Wade, well, I can take it or leave it. Did I mention 9/11? Reagan!

McCain: Iraq! Never give and never surrender! Reagan! Hey! You kids get off my lawn!

Romney: I will say anything to get your vote so please, pay attention to my hair and not my record. Reagan! Reagan! Reagan!

Hunter: I see brown people! We must build a wall!

Tancredo: I see brown people and I want to catapult them over that wall!

Huckabee: Abortion is the WORST THING EVAH! Every sperm is sacred! But I am not a crazy as I seem at first blush.

Gilmore: 9/11! I am the real conservative in this race! Reagan!

Paul: We must destroy the IRS! (tap, tap, tap) Is this thing on? (tap, tap, tap) What are you people, an audience or an oil painting? (tap, tap) Hello? Hello?

Thompson: We should make it legal to fire homosexuals for their icky gayness! Oh, and I was once a governor.

Brownback: Abortion equals Islamofascism! More Jesus can solve all of our problems. I Heart Theocracy!

OK – I admit that this is somewhat cursory, but this is what I got out of it. Did I miss anything?